I promised to let as many folks know as possible, so just in case you weren’t aware (and apologies if you are)...it’s official, my Fatties are back!
Our adventures resume where they left off in Fat Dogs 3. You’ll read more about old friends and acquaintances, and meet new people along the way. One or two of these turned out to be tricky customers who end up testing Jack’s patience to the max. Mind you, that’s not overly difficult. Others, though, were gems.
One such couple, Jacques and Murielle, are so delightfully nutty we now look forward to each meeting, wondering whether their latest stories can possibly better their last. They always do.
For this preview snippet, try to imagine yourself at our local auberge, when Jacques held up his hand.
“We have a hunting story,” he said.
“Please tell us,” replied Jack. “I’m sure it’ll be much more interesting than the drivel we’ve been listening to recently.”
“Well, I was in the bath,” announced Murielle.
That stopped us in our tracks.
“Oh?” we replied in unison.
“Yes. And a fox walked in.”
“Did it? Are you sure?”
“Yes, a big one. Jacques! I shouted, there's a fox in my bathroom.”
“You are mad! I replied,” cried Jacques, warming to his role.
“But there is! It’s standing looking at me.”
“So,” continued Jacques, “I rushed in, of course, convinced she had gone crazy, but no! there it was, a big fox!”
“Yes! I told her to stay there and went to fetch my shotgun…”
The conclusion to this extraordinary yarn was as eccentric as the beginning.
I also tell you lots of stories about animals. Sam, of course, you know, but not all. Naughty Ginger, for example, is a newcomer. For this next extract, you’ll just have to remember how much Jack ‘dislikes’ animals…
Jack held the kitten at head height and began lecturing it about mountain climbing security measures. The kitten studied him, then extended a tiny paw and patted his nose. He brought it closer still.
“It’s the first time I’ve heard it,” he chuckled.
“What?” I asked, reaching for the camera.
“It’s purring. It’s purring like a little vintage tractor.”
“Awww, you big softy.”
Jack gently lowered it to his knee, where it contentedly played climbing games at a more sensible level.
Poor gruff Jack. He was putty in that kitten’s paws.
Our adventures take twists and painful turns. Drama was never far away.
The forest gate swung open and out hurtled the Polish team’s truck in a cloud of dust. It ground to a halt next to us. One of the men was propped-up by a colleague in the cargo area.
“Przepraszam, gdzie znajduje się szpital?” cried the driver.
We had absolutely no idea what he had said. We paused, helpless.
He tried again.
“Szpital. Szpital! Erm…” he paused, searching for the right words.
“Leon jest ranny, źle krwawi... Zranił się w nogę.”
This was getting us nowhere.
The man was frantic. We shrugged, wanting to help, but couldn’t work out what the problem was. He pointed to his colleague, beckoning urgently. We rushed over to find the man bleeding copiously from a leg wound.
“Hospital. Now!” cried Jack.
So that’s enough tasters from me. The book is published on 1st February, but you can preorder a Kindle copy now using this link. (A heartfelt thank-you if you already have.)
I’m so excited about sharing our latest escapades with you and look forward to hearing your comments. As you’ll find in Fat Dogs and French Estates Part IV, there’s never a dull moment in our sleepy corner of France. I just hope it stays that way!